The One Where I Choose A Word

2017 One Word Update here.  HOPE.



So it's one of those mornings where I have a stretch of silence.  I catch up on some reading.  I check Facebook to find a number of new posts.  Blogs I follow.

Ann Voscamp is one such blog.  I don't know where I've been that I didn't hear about her until this summer.  But I found her!  And her words speak to the soul of me, in ways that I've needed to hear (I think) all my life.  She's the girlfriend, she's the Titus 2 woman you I have hoped for, and I don't even know her.   Heaven awaits the day I do!

Her Blog today is: How To Move Forward Into A New Year when you feel like you failed last year

"What if everyone is making New Years Resolution and you just want New You Solutions" "Sometimes you can hardly trust your legs, trust turning and taking the next step" "Falling Apart? Fall into What.Ever.Comes.Next FORWARD!"  "Fearful? Forward!" 

And in that blog is this one, well several links, but his is the one I read: Fear's the first step of faith

"The things in my life that require faith are the things that terrify me"
"Fear offers two routes: Flee or Faith. High tail-it or Trust"

I go back to the first post and read her "footnotes" below which leads me to this blog: What the New Year Needs Most A Blog about naming your year.  A name for your year.  Interesting.  I haven't heard of this concept.  I read on.  She talks about euchristeo and names her new year koinonia.  Greek words.  I love greek words.  How they get right to the heart of the matter.  No need to wonder if it's there, they're or their.  Nope.  The greek is straightforward.  This word means this and (generally) only this and in the event it means something else, the root word for that something else is clear and certain.

I flip back to Facebook.  More posts.  More blogs. Sarah Bessey (another writer/blogger I found through blog hopping) posts something interesting.  Something I hadn't seen before. SheLovesMagazine.  Wow, what a great organization! What a wonderful community!! Wow! I kept reading and reading and reading.  Wow!  And come to yet another One Word blog.

The part that resounded with me is "the underlying message (of making resolutions) seems to be who I am right now isn't making the cut"

A to-do list of life for the next year.  And sure we all want to lose weight, be intentional, save money, say no, recycle, unplug, eat healthier, save the world….the truth of the matter is we make the lists to feel better, to be enough.  Stop with the lists!

And that brings me to this OneWord365

I read through the suggested list:

Imagine, Different, Push, Celebrate, Believe, Thrive, Relentless, Finish, Transformation, Learn, Reduce, Grace, Today, Confidence, Health, Purpose, Unstoppable, Enjoy, Truth, Generous, Soar, Commit, Forward, Awake, Change, Focus, Invest, Peace, No, Fortitude, Empower, Curious, Direction, Opportunity, Embrace, Present, Ambition, Growth, Connect, Perspective, Persistence, Stewardship, Strength, Action, Adapt, Progress, Adventure, Selah, Mindfulness, Appreciate, Create, Optimism, Breathe, Integrity, Uplift, Simplify, Freedom, New, Rebuilding, Joy, Courage, Momentum, Trust, Reflection, Possibility, Sacrifice, Relax, Organize, Pause, Be, Listen, Ignite, Determined, Balance, Silence, Release, Faith, Resolve, Together, Dare, Revel, Love, Minimize, Discover, Choose, Diligence, Brave, Risk, Open, Transition, Slow, More, Shine, Live, Write, Battle. 

All of these words are good.  Good words.  I like several of them.  I should pick several of them.  I'm tempted to pick one per month!  But that's not the point of the exercise.   I need to focus.  Draw down.  Narrow my thoughts down to one that frightens me a bit. I do many of these words.  Am many of these words.   What's the word that I'm not?  That doesn't come easily?

Trust.  The passage that comes to mind is Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not to your own understanding.  In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make straight your path.

The Hebrew word is Batach, a verb, To Trust.
To Trust In
To have confidence
To be bold
To be secure

The Greek word is Elpizo, a verb, to hope.
To wait for salvation with joy and confidence.

Root Word: Elpis
Expectation of good, of hope
Joyful and confident expectation of salvation
The author of hope, of He who is it's foundation
A thing hoped for

Noah Webster defines it as:
Confidence, a reliance or resting of the mind on the integrity, veracity, justice, friendship or other sound principle of another person.

You can find Noah's Dictionary here.

All definitions lead to Confidence.

Interesting…. Confidence in Hebrew: Batach


Greek: Peitho verb  To Persuade

To be persuaded.
To believe
To listen to, to obey, to yield to, to comply with

TRUST

To trust in The Lord and lean not (support oneself)
To trust in myself, build on my strengths, learn from my weakness.
To trust in my relationships, believe the best in others.
To trust the journey, the road will rise up to meet me

To NOT trust in performance, perfection, perspectives, primes or prizes.
To NOT trust in ability, acceptance, attitudes, alternatives or achievement.

But to spend 2014 trusting, trusted, learning to trust, being a trustee.  It's scary, but as Ann said Fear is the First Step of Faith.  Let me be found being faithful.  Amen!

The One Where I Follow Along

 

 

So me and my fellow bloggers have spent the past 25 days being thankful. And it will continue for 5 more days. For me it's not the random, thankfulness. My family, my friends, my belongings. I don't know where I've been that I just heard of Ann Voskamp this year and her amazing book One Thousand Gifts, but it happened.

 

I thought, yea I'd like to read this book. It looked good. It's not fiction and well y'all know that I'm not like my other blogging girls, I don't read much. I'm not in a book club, oh my, the thought of a book club makes me stressed out. Reading with a time limit.... I seriously might be breaking out in hives right.now!

 

Anyway, I found her blog from another blog, and saw her book and then read some reviews. Because I'm not an avid reader. I'm excited to say I've read two books this year! So I read the reviews to, ya know, sway me from reading her book. But I saw her book at HPB one day and got all giddy I set out to read it. Eeeeek... 5 more days of November left and I'm not finish and she has another book out that I want to read in December!

 

Anyway, it's a great book about living in the moment. Right now. What can you find to be grateful for, where you are in the mundane. In Dinner and Dishes and Diapers. In the hard, In things seen out your window, In things Sweet, Salty and Sipped, In things Handmade, Held and Happy, In things Silent, In things Golden, In Things Ugly, In things Beautiful, In All Things....

I Thessalonians 5:16-18 Rejoice Always Pray Without Ceasing Give Thanks In All Circumstances

One Thousand Gifts

It's not too late to begin.... I'm only to 200!

The First Thanksgiving

 

This is about Blogs I Follow, aside from fitness/running blogs. Since this month is about Thankfulness. I want to take this time to give thanks for these ladies who I don't know in person, feel like I've known my whole life. Laugh with, Cry with. If I'm honest, Laugh at, Envy just a tad, they write beautifully, witty, inspiring, they write the words that are in my head!

I have a board on Pinterst called Following....Blogs Worth Reading. I have these ladies:

Ann VosKamp
Jen Hatmaker
Amanda Williams

 

Jen Hatmaker I "met" through my Triple S Blogger Sarah. She posted a link on Facebook, I read it and fell in love with her! Her openness, her hilarity, her spiciness. I don't remember which blog exactly Sarah posted that I latched onto, but I liked her on Facebook and well, I've enjoyed the journey ever since.

 

This blog is where I found Ann VosKamp. And had to find out what she meant by "what would Ann VosKamp do"?

 

She and Ann are part of a thing coming up in February that I'm soooo excited for called:

 

The IF Gathering If God is real, then what?

If you're read here a while and if you follow me on Facebook or Twitter, you know that I'm on Instagram. Probably more than the other two mediums. That's how I found Amanda. I'm not sure exactly how I found She Reads Truth. I think I was looking for a devotional to read and looked up under the New tab on YouVersion and saw She Reads Truth. Maybe I saw something on Instagram. I dunno. It's been nearly a year. January 2013 I did my first SRT Study. Wow. Everyone is so... So Good. Speaks right to the heart of the matter. It's like sitting down with a girlfriend.

 

Anyway, on Instagram in September I started seeing all these #31days hashtags and talk of blogs and this exciting buzz about blogging about 1 topic for 31 days. I'm sure I've always known Amanda has a blog. I mean really in this day and age, doesn't everyone have a blog. I mean I have two! Really more than that but I'm trying to consolidate my blogs into one ....er.... two places. Not all my topics are running worthy and I have another blog for that.... those thoughts or craziness!

 

Amanda posted her blog and I fell into a must.have.more! Wish.she.was.my.neighbor! We.would.drink.lots.of.coffee! Kind of thing. Love her blog. She seriously hits it. And it's really just her life, but I feel like I'm living it with her. I'll be honest, I didn't at first think I'd have much in common with her (she has small people, twins infact. I have teenagers, well that's the main difference, we're in difference seasons), except SheReadsTruth (duh?! how did I just figure out she's a writer at SRT) and coffee. Oh but isn't that enough! Yes, yes it is!

 

 

Her topic was 31 Secrets Moms Keep, hmmmm, sounded good. Some of her posts were funny, Some where insightful, Most were down to the bones honest.

 

Posts like:

Prayer
Grace
Hugs
Tired
You Inspire Us
There's A Club
The Monster
Therapy
The Truth

There you have it.... my thankful Pin Up! I'm thankful for these ladies, who speak truth, help me laugh, feel normal that I'm oh so not normal and encourage me to keep on the journey. Life like running is a journey. There are easy days, hard days, days of sprints, long days, days you don't want to repeat, days you wish would go on forever! It's in the journey you figure out who are you, what you're pace is, where you need to be challenged, and what techniques don't work for you.

 

Enjoy The Journey. Count Your Blessings, They are gifts. It's No Secret, Motherhood is Hard. Find Your Spicy, Don't Look Back (or at the Sweet)

 

#shereadstruth Day 18 Where is your treasure?

When I read this it reminded me of Idol Worship.  I heard a great sermon on this tis year, these are my notes on No Other Gods.


God starts with Himself. Command one. 

No other gods before the One True God. 

God begins with the root of the issue. Idolatry 

I AM. Reminding them. 

Because we're a forgetful people. He just parted the sea. Brought water out from a rock. Manna from heaven. 

But God knows the tendency of the human heart to wander. 

An idol is anything/one that our heart wanders to. Idolatry is the pursuit of that idol. 

1. We all struggle with idolatry 

Don't worship the things that are already there. But also DO NOT make anything either. 

God wants NOTHING to compete for the spiritual attention of his people. 

Exodus 20 is the first time the bible uses these words. Idol worship. 

Israelites are in a perpetual pattern of worshipping god, turning from god, turning back. 

2. We needs to identify our idols. 

Idol: anything our heart wanders to. Idolatry. Is the pursuit of that thing. 

Idols are not bad things that enslave us without our permission that we voluntarily give ourself to. 

Questions: 

What's your greatest fear? 

Poverty

Loneliness 

Single hood 

You're idol is the thing you put your faith in to calm your fear that IS your idol. 

Where do you run for comfort in troubling times? 

Alcohol 

Drugs

Sex

Shopping 

If loneliness is my fear - friends become our idol. 

What do you complain about the most? 

Boss 

Bank account 

Kids 

Spouse 

What causes you to be angry with God? 

We get angry with God when He doesn't give us our idols. 

He refuses to fashion the golden calf 

If you could have anything what would it be? 

And have you gotten what you really wanted and had the joy ended moments after receiving it? Moments!! 

All things are good as long as it directs our heart toward God. Even a really good cup of coffee. :) 

If your fire has dwindled to embers then you have an idol. 

Idolatry keeps us from the fruit of the spirit. When the idol is in place you gravitate toward the works if the flesh. 

3. God is concerned about idolatry for a good reason. We will become like our idols. 

2 kings 17:15. 

They became the things they worshipped. 

The idols were worthless and they became worthless. 

Our lives should be built on becoming like Christ.

Psalm 56:3 

What you fear reveals what you value the most. What you fear reveals where you trust God the least 

What do you value. 

1. Family/relationships 

2. Money

3. Safety 

4. Acceptance by family, friends, outsiders 

What do you fear? 

Loss of family/relationships, acceptance, money

In order to face the what ifs of fear you must acknowledge your fear (name your idols) and choose to trust God.

#shereadstruth Day 16

Oh how it stings.

James 3:11-12
Colossians 4:6

Speak Evil
Gracious
Seasoned with Salt


Only one lawgiver
Able to save or destroy
Who Are You?

Pierced, am I.  I am opinionated and critical.

Remember your place - You Are Not The Light.
The job of the Holy Spirit has been filled, no more applicants need apply!

God will convict - this is not your position
God will judge - this is not your position
God will make sin apparent - this is not your position

Do you help or harm?
Is it about your or their well being?

A critical heart is a problem, it usurps God's position.  A critical heart is toxic for your faith because it places you before God in your own eyes.

Speak evil: katalaleo verb
To speak against one, to criminate.

Root: katalalos noun
A Defamer

Gracious: Noah Webster
Favorable, Kind, Expressing kindness, contributing to the happiness of others.

Seasoned: artyo verb
To prepare, to arrange

Root: airo verb
To raise up, lift up, elevate

Salt: halas noun
symbol of lasting concord because it protects and preserves.
wisdom and grace in speech

For some reason this reminds me of Nichole Nordemans song Take Me As I Am:

To wear wisdom like Solomon's robe
For the patience and perspective of a man like Job
Just to soar on wings of eagles
For no other reason than the bird's eye view
For a flight or two
And the list gets longer
Who I wish I was, and was no longer

…..and the list gets longer… between who I wish I was and (want to be) no longer. 

I know that all of this has to do with heart change and of that I'm in desperate need.  Desperate.
I can't be good enough, I want to be.  I'm not.  I fail and fail and fail again.  Yet trying each day to submit,  resist, draw near, receive grace, be humble…..before I am humbled.  

#shereadstruth Day 15

James Study:

More Grace                        Free                   Watches
Proud                                 Open                  Sojourners
Humble                              Lifts                    Upholds
The LORD                        Loves


We are wanderers, faithless, striving, controlling, doubters, idolators, sinners, fighters, takers.

BUT GOD - my favorite phrase in the bible….

I have to start over….every day, every hour, every minute….   Submit, Resist, Draw Near, Be Cleansed (receive grace) Humble Before the Lord.

More: Megas adj.  Greater.
Used of intensity and its degree of splendor, prepared on a grand scale.

Root 1: Megistos adj. Greatest, very great, exceedingly great.
Root 2: Meizon  comparative  Greater.  Larger.  Stronger.

Grace: Charis noun.

1. that which affords joy, pleasure, delight, sweetness, charm

2. Good, well, loving kindness, favor - of the merciful kindness by which God, exerting His Holy influence up on souls, turns them to Christ.
* Keeps Them
* Strengthens Them
* Increases Them in faith, knowledge and affection

3. The spiritual condition of one governed by the power of divine grace.

Proud Hyperephanos adj.
Showing ones self above others.  Overestimate of ones means or merits.  Despising others. Treating them with contempt.  Haughty.

Referece: Proverbs 3:24 in Septuagint.  But in the Hebrew it's not proud but scoffer.

He scoffs at the scoffer, yet He gives grace to the afflicted.

Scoff: luwts verb
To scorn, make mouths at, talk arrogantly, to mock, to boast, to be inflated.

Affliced: anav noun
Poor, humble, afflicted, meek, needy, lowly

Humble: tapeinos adj.
Lowly in spirit

The Lord: Covenant God.

Free: nathar verb
Unfasten, loosen, set free, unbind.

Open: paqach verb To open the eyes specifically.

Lifts: zaqaph verb
used only twice
To raise up - all those bowed down.

those who are bowed down:
Kindred to one being hollow or arched.
Hebrew: Hollow

Watches: shamar verb
To keep, to guard, to keep watch & ward. To Protect, Save life.

Sojourner: Get noun
A temporary inhabitant.
A newcomer lacking inherited rights.

Root: guwr verb
Abide, dwell, inhabit, to be a stranger, to be continuing - surely.

Upholds: uwd verb
To Surround
To go round and round
To restore, relieve


But He gives more grace:
Very great loving kindness.

Treat others better than yourself…. don't treat them with contempt.
Don't mock others or be arrogant.

Get yourself back to your appointed place. See Day 12

Although you journey, continue on, surely.  The Lord keeps watch over you, protects you, saves you.
Stop all this striving, it's just one foot in front of the other, sometimes it's rocky, but keep going.  You are restored, you are supported, there is hope.  Keep on expecting good.

#shereadstruth Day 13

Wise Women.

I have a few women I confide in, a few older women I will go to for sage advice. I don't exactly have parents, so I've adopted and been adopted by a sweet older couple who I go to often, particularly about parenting decisions.  They've been in my shoes, I consider them wise.

I have a few friends who say I'm the wisest person they know.... I think they need to get out more! Surely there are others wiser than me. 

I try to obtain knowledge on a variety of topics, only because I have enough life going on that I need to depend on those who are wiser.  I read books.  The Bible, Blogs, Books.  Mostly on relationships.  Improving mine.  My Parenting, My Marriage, The Voice in my Head that tells me I'm doing it all wrong. 

So I read.  I'm not that good at reading. I'm dyslexic and it makes reading challenging.  Which is why I use a dictionary, several dictionaries, all the time.  I like lexicons and old English dictionaries.  I like to get to the root of the matter.

Speaking of Roots.  Let's lay some down.

Wise                                                               Jealousy
Understanding                                                Strife
Good Conduct                                                Disorder
Meekness of Wisdom
Peaceful
Gentle
Open to Reason

Just gonna focus on a few of these today.

Understanding: epistemon - Intelligent, Experienced

Root: epistamai -
To put ones attention
To fix ones thoughts on
to understand, to know.

Meekness: prayles - noun  Mildness of disposition

Root: prays
Stems from the trust of Gods goodness and control over the situation

The gentle person who is not occupied with self.  This is a work of the Holy Spirit and not of human will.  This is actually in the definition notes.
Comments on jealousy and envy.  The ESV uses jealousy, but the word in greek is envy.  Lets look at this for a moment.

Jealousy:  This is a fear based emotion.  A fear of rejection.  I "fear" you because of who you are, I feel displaced.

Webster 1828: A passion of a peculiar uneasiness which arises from the fear that a rival may rob us of the affection of one whom we love.   Nearly allied to envy, for jealousy, is before "a good" is lost, is converted to envy after being obtained by others.

Envy:  Also fear based emotion.  A comparison fear.  I "fear" you because of what you have.  Better relationships, possession, skills. 

Webster 1828:  A feeling of uneasiness at the (supposed) superior condition, prosperity and happiness of another.

Zelos - Noun Zeal on behalf of a person or a thing.  Fierce indignation, contentious rivalry.
Root: Zeo  Boiling Anger.


Disorder: akatastasia - noun  Instability, A state of disorder, Disturbance, Confusion
Root: akatastatos - adj. Unstable.  Inconstant.  Restless.
used once.  James 1:8 a double minded man is unstable in all his ways.

This makes me chuckle just a tad, as it reminds me of my kiddo in his younger days of Thomas the Train obsession!  "you are causing confusion and delay"  And in searching that comment I came upon some interesting info about Autism Spectrum and Thomas the Train.  Get to know my kiddo a little better while I study James.  Hmmmm... Ask God for wisdom... He doesn't fail to respond!

I also thing it's interesting that the last verse places righteousness before peace.... God is indeed a God of order.

There's a little nugget tucked into Romans 14:17 .... the kingdom of God is not...
but of righteousness, peace and joy in the Holy Spirit. 

There is no peace without right standing.  Right Standing isn't a fruit.  It's your position.  It's who you are, through who's you are.  The righteousness of God through Christ Jesus (Rom 3:22 & 2 Cor 5:21)

Without righteousness there is no peace.  If you don't understand your position, you will not live in peace. 

I don't have to hope for wisdom or understanding.  I need in meekness (trust in God's goodness)to ask for wisdom. Don't live in fear and disorder.   I don't bear fruit without being in position.  Right Standing.  Trusting in God's goodness is wise. 

#shereadstruth Day 12

My thoughts before I get into defining the words that stuck out for me today:

The only way to resist is by submitting to God.  Drawing near.   Humble yourself before God. Get in your appointed place, the wing, the cleft of the rock, hemmed in, in the shadow of the Almighty.   Withstand, continue on safe and sound.  Draw near, join together (have the mind of Christ 1 Cor 2:16)  with God in your place and position, Likewise God will position Himself to you.
This is how you have "clean hands" "purified heart" This is not a work of our own but of the Holy Spirit.

Submit: hypotasso - Verb Arrange Under (yea, that's helpful)  I generally defer "all things submission to Rachel Evans.

I find it interesting that in the verse prior the greek uses the word Humble: Tapeinos Adj. Lowly in Spirit

Then in verse 10 uses Humble again.  But in Verse 7 "Submit yourself to God"

Root 1: hypos - by or under
Root 2: tasso - to put in order, to appoint.

Resist: anthistemi - Verb  Withstand. Resist. Oppose (or benadryl, sounds like antihistamine)

Root 1: anti  Over, Against, Opposite
Root 2: histemi   To cause, to make to stand. To make firm, fix, established.

I like definition #3 To continue safe and sound.  To stand unharmed.

For me, many times I get all heebee jeebee'd out when I read these tests… resist the devil, stand against the schemes, withstand in the evil days…  I feel powerless and a little scared.

Draw Near:  eggizo - Verb  To bring near.  To join one thing to another, to approach

Root: eggys Near of place and position.

Those who are near access to God.

Cleanse: Katharizo - Verb  To make clean.
In a moral sense:
1. free from defilement
2. to purify from wickedness
3. to free from guilt of sin

All things I'm incapable of.

Purify: hagnizo Verb  1. Ceremonially.  To make pure, purify, cleanse. 2. Morally

Root: hagnos adj.   Definition 2. Pure:
1. Pure from carnality, chaste, modest
2. Pure from every fault, immaculate
3. Clean

All things that I am not able to do.  Pure from carnality? Pure from every fault? Immaculate? Please, even my house isn't immaculate.  Let alone my mind, my heart, my soul, my spiritual life.

But when I am humble, our good friend Noah describes it as:

A deep sense of unworthiness in the sight of God.

That I am, have, can be.   When I'm in my appointed place, in the wing, cleft, shadow; resisting is okay, not scary.  I can withstand, continue on safe and sound.  Draw near, approach.  It's ok because I'm clean and pure through grace.   Yes I have a sin nature.  I am not the sin.  I mess up, every day, every hour, minute.   But I know I can approach the throne of grace with confidence. (Heb 4:16)  Receive wisdom without judgment.  Speak life (if only for a moment), before I mess up again, starting the process all over again.  And that's life.  The journey. The lessons learned.

Grace and Peace to you (and me)